During the national reed dance, thousands of young Eswatini ladies line up half-naked at the king’s palace hoping to get picked by King Mswati to be the new queen. Only one gets picked.
The good thing with waiting to be picked is that it is someone else’s responsibility to pick us. Waiting to be picked means that we only need to sit pretty and “trust the process”. It’s a good place to hide.
The other alternative is picking ourselves.
If I want to be a pastor I can start preaching in the streets before pastor Nganga appoints me to be in-charge of one of his kiosks.
If we want to be poets, we can start writing poems before the National Council of Poetry picks us to present a poem on National poetry day.
The problem with picking ourselves, is that we get to take responsibility. There is no hiding.
In 2017, out of the thousands of brides, King Mwasti picked the daughter of his cabinet minister as the 14th wife.
Someone will be picked. But it probably won’t be us.
Life is life
Fabio is a mental health professional, researcher and lecturer of psychology at Kenyatta University.