I woke up on New Year’s Day with anticipation of good tidings and new beginnings.
I look at my bed. Who is this sleeping next to me? Damn. It’s the same old wife. I smile.
The best strategic decision I have ever made in my life.
I go to the bathroom and look at my naked frame. I don’t like what I see.
My house has a floor, so I do some Burpees and squats. My knees are squeaky and painful. Damn. I’m getting old. How much time do I have left on this earth?
I walk to the living room and see my kids. They shout happy new year dad. It warms heart.
I want to hug them. But they ignore me and continue with their business. I love their sincerity.
I start scrolling mindlessly through social media. Lots of new year hullabaloo.
I hear a Truecaller message come in. I quickly open the message hoping that someone has sent me money.
Surprise, surprise. It’s a reminder that I should pay my loan. I guess I carried my financial woes with me as I “crossed over” into the new year.
I step outside. The sun is up as usual. A little too hot for my liking. Nature seems to be indifferent to my likes and dislikes.
I take a solitary walk around the neighbourhood. There is a heavy feeling that I have lived way below my potential.
The question lingers in my mind,
What’s holding me back?
Fear.
Here’s is to a fearless 2025.
Life is life
Fabio is a mental health professional, researcher and lecturer of psychology at Kenyatta university.